smacky and bucky

In the comments section of my last post, Grrrface asked, "You read Mary Worth?" She sounded a little disbelieving, as if reading a 60-year-old soap opera comic was silly. Well, let me put it into context before the last shred of indie cred I had is gone... (I'm being sarcastic, as I'm not even sure what "indie cred" means. Does it mean I start hating my favorite band after they get a major label deal and the public discovers them? Because I've always thought that was silly. If you love a band, why not let them succeed?)

Anyway, I started reading Mary Worth online recently because of The Comics Curmudgeon. He analyzes the daily comics, with hilarious results. And the comments section of that site is gold. I almost spit Dr. Pepper on the monitor after reading this gem about Ms. Worth:

I'd give anything for a panel immediately after the now inevitable sexual assualt on Mary Worth's person, where she stares into the "camera" nearly catatonic, her hair askew and her lipstick smudged and says simply "Hells bells. I forgot the eggs."

I know it's not polite laughing at old lady rape, but since this is a strip running in family newspapers, it will never come to that point. So the sick part is the writer clearly wants you to take it to that point in your mind. Mary Worth has a stalker. Stalkers don't take no for an answer. Stalkers don't "turn good." However this is resolved, the only realistic ending would be Mary Worth in tears (or dead) and Aldo Kelrast in handcuffs.

Do you understand my sick fascination now?

The site also takes panels out of context so you can see how bizarre they really are, such as...


To whom is Randy (from Judge Parker) giving this advice? I imagine he's with some crack whore, he is her very first customer, and he's explaining how he like's it. He's obviously standing above the person, looking down at her with a leer.

The "Harvard Law" sweatshirt just reinforces that opinion.