smacky and bucky

Larry King used to have a "column" in USA Today. It was really a precursor to the blog: A set of random statements, completely disjointed. He'd say thing like, "For my money, angel hair is the finest pasta," and "If you ask me, Jackie Gleason was America's favorite funnyman." I'm bringing this up because my post today will be just like that! So let's get started...

I love my commute. At 6:33 this morning, I was still in bed. At 6:45 I was walking to my car. At 7:00 I was pulling into my parking space.

I hate to shave. It's both tedious and dangerous. I sometimes skip days when no meetings are scheduled and I'll just be at my desk in my windowless office.

I listened to Patsy Cline in the car this morning. I often forget just how utterly amazing her voice is: smooth and strong, without that fake twang country artists feel the need to force today, or worse, that vibrato weak female singers use to hold a note when their lungs can't handle it. It's not fooling anyone. Other artists that have perfect voices: Frank Sinatra and Curtis Mayfield.

I'm glad the surge in popularity in the zombie genre finally allowed George Romero (the king of zombie films) to get his fourth one made. I also hope it doesn't suck. At least they're not fast-moving zombies. WTF is up with that?
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I had a conversation with someone recently about the decline in quality in your basic stormtrooper as the films progress. Viewing the films in chronological number (not in order of original release), we see that the clones are bred and trained for one reason: combat. Yet by Empire, they can't kit the side of a vehicle the size of the Millennium Falcon with a cannon. And of course by Return of the Jedi, the armed stormtroopers are pummeled with rocks and the ewoks do a pile-on more disturbing than any photo from Abu Ghraib.

How did they reach this nadir? We decided that due to the age-acceleration used to raise the clones to fighting age, by the time A New Hope begins (about 20 years after Revenge of the Sith) most of the clones are retired or dead. With the rise in power of the Empire, a rigorous galaxywide recruitment program was undertaken. Ordinary boys with no future (like farmboy Luke on his desert planet) are given three squares a day and escape from their dead end lives. Since the Empire needed to fortify its hold on the systems, they needed a lot of men and they needed them fast. No time to breed new clones. Also, the standards for entry were probably not very stringent. The Emperor realized that for every body in a stormtrooper uniform, that's one less guy in the rebellion. And so what if he can't shoot, or he's a little slow? He's completely expendible.

That's our explanation. What do you think?